What You Think Love Should be Able to Overcome
by TwilightFreak00
Summary: Bella returns back to Forks 4 years after Edward left her. She returns to find that she has a strong love for Jacob, who has already imprinted. Oh...and don't think the Volturi and the Cullens won't get involved. Contains GRAPHIC LEMONS and ADULT THEMES.
1. Chapter 1

_**What You Think True Love Should Be Able to Overcome**_

My mind was in a swirl of thoughts as I passed the sign that read 'Welcome to Forks'. The sign hasn't changed, maybe Forks hasn't changed. More importantly, maybe La Push hasn't changed. I can't be that lucky.

Four years. Four long, lifeless years I've tried to forget about this place. And now I'm returning. Is it because I'm weak? I'd like to think not. But deep down I know that's the answer. I'm weak. I'm returning to the man that put my life back together. Hoping he'll help pick up the peices once more. A part of me worries that he's imprinted...that he's moved on. Another hopes he's imprinted and moved on. I'm in limbo with that thought right now. Maybe he doesn't even live in La Push. Maybe he's stopped phasing and just moved away. Gone to some college in California. I couldn't picture it.

My old chevy died about a year after I left. Making me go buy some modern day pontiac. I wonder what the wolves on the side of the road thought when I passed them. Were they angry? Frightened? Did they go right to Sam? warning him that the bloodsuckers girl was back? I wouldn't doubt it.

I stopped across the road from the little one story red house. The garage door was opened. Of course I had to come on the day that a get together was happening. I recognized Quil, Embry, Jared and Paul running into the garage they didn't look any different. I didn't see Jacob. Should that worry me? I'm not sure.

Claire ran across the yard into the house. Leah was chasing her. And then Leah stopped. She looked into my eyes and then I looked down. Time to face this. I heard the click of the handle as I pressed on it. I almost chickened out and brought out my lead foot but then I thought about Jacob. I drove hours just to be here. I can't turn back now.

I shut the car door behind me trying not to be too loud. I'm going to hide as long as I possibly can. I heard music coming from the garage and laughing. I went to the front door of the red house and didn't even knock on it before someone answered. This someone was a girl. She was about my size with long black hair. Her eyes were dark brown. Her skin like Jacobs.

"Bella Swan?" her voice was small, shy almost. "Yeah.", "Oh my God! We've missed you." The girl hugged me. She even smelt like Jacob. "I'm Rebecca. Don't you remember me?" Oh. Jacob's sister. I was starting to wonder...

"Yeah! I remember." I couldn't bring a smile to my face. "Come in Bella. Come in." she took my hand and dragged me inside. I didn't hear anyone. She led me to the kitchen where I smelt muffins and brownies. "Look who it is Em! Bella." Emily turned around and gave me a welcoming smile. "I can't believe it. We thought you were gone for ever! I'm so glad that your back sweetie.", "Thanks Emily."

"Sit, please." Emily told me and I did. "I'm going to tell everyone she's here." I tried to stop Rebecca but then decided against it. This is why I'm here. I tried to remind myself. I'm here to start over. "Your here to see Jacob aren't you?" Emily's voice was suddenly cold. I can understand that.

"Yes. Mainly. But I missed you all." Emily was about to speak but then something behind me made her stop talking. "Bella?" The voice made my heart skip a beat. I stood up and turned around slowly. Where had my Jacob gone? This isn't him.

His hair was cropped again but he looked sick. He looked older. He looked...like a man who'd left his past behind and moved on. "Jacob." I haven't said the name out loud for years. It sounded sickly on my lips. "Why're you here?" he asked. His voice was different. Gruff, unwelcoming.

"I just wanted to-" he grabbed my hand. I gasped. He took me to his bedroom and slammed the door. He looked into my eyes and I threw myself at him. His lips were welcoming to me but then I noticed something. His body wasn't hot anymore. He was just...warm. I pulled myself back and stepped away.

"Jacob you...? Your not." I couldn't say it. "Bella don't be angry." I won't be. "Why would I be angry? You've finally found someone to love. I told you that you would." How can I be angry about Jacob finding someone to love? I pushed him away from me...this was to be excpected.

"I know why you came back Bella. You finally realized you loved me.", "What?! You think I came back because I love you?" Your so right. "No, I think you came to Forks, went through Forks, came to my house to see me, because you love me." I sighed and plopped down on his bed.

"Your right.I do love you. But I guess I'm too late." he smiled. "I guess it's nice to know you love me those. After all of those years of fighting, you've finally realized it."

Someone knocked on Jacob's bedroom door. He opened it. I couldn't see who it was. "I'll be out in as sec. baby." he shut the door and turned to me. I faced on a smile. "So...who is she?", "Her name is Bailey. We don't have to talk about her though.", "No, I want to." I wish you wouldn't!

"Okay...um I met her a year after you left. We're engaged." I almost grabbed my chest. Almost. "Oh. Am I invited?" I smiled. Attempting to lighten the mood. But the tensness in the air was thick. "Bells..." he put his head in his hands. He really isn't going to invite me? I would've invited him to me and...Edwards. If he would've stayed.

"Bailey doesn't know about you. It'd be weird if you came." I wasn't going to fight with him. It's his life. I'm just interfering. "How long are you staying?" his words made me hopeful that we could at least still be friends. When did we switch roles? "I'm not sure. I dropped out of college so...as long as you guys want me here." he didn't smile like I thought he would.

"Did...you want me to leave?", "No Bells. Where are you going to stay?", "Um...I was thinking in my car. A motel. Charlie has Sue, Leah, and Seth so I don't want to intrude.", "You could stay with us. Billy wouldn't mind.", "Jake that's not a good idea." he smiled this time.

"Your my best friend. Your staying here. Do you have your things." , "Yeah.", "I'll help you carry them in." Jacob helped me up and I smiled at him. He smiled his wide toothy grin right back at me. When we walked out of the bedroom I half excpected him to keep his hold on my hand. Like he used to, but he didn't. He looked apologetically at me.

It's not like I want to ruin his relationship so I just shrugged it off. While Jacob and I were carrying my things in I noticed something. Jacob looked different. I stopped when we got into the house and put my things down. He looked at me but I stopped him from saying anything. I touched his arm. I was right. He's no longer a werewolf. He kept the muscle just not the rest of it.

Shouldn't I be glad he's imprinted? That he's begun to start his life? He's only my best friend..aren't I supposed to want the absolute best for him? "Yeah, well I guess you've noticed I'm not a werewolf anymore." that's Jacob. Always trying to lighten the mood. "Yeah." was all that I could force myself to say.

I remember asking him, many years ago, about what it was like being half wolf. He said it had it's good sides and it's bad sides. Like anything else. And then I had asked him again, before I left, and he said it was the best thing in the world. I remembering him say that he loved the freedom and the speed the most. Is he that happy now? Of course he is Bella. He's imprinted!

Jacob took my things to his bedroom and sat them on his bed. I walked into it and sat down on the bed. "So Bella. Hows it all been?" he sat next to me. "Not well. Doesn't Bailey need you?", "Not right now. We're catching up. So tell me everything.", "Jacob, you dont want to hear. It really isn't a happy story.", "Tell me anyways."

I sighed, getting angry with Jacob's persistance. "Okay I left Forks to get away from everything. To get away from everyone.", "So you didn't leave to go and look for him?", "No, of course not! I'm not that stupid. Now don't interupt." I tried to remember where I was in my story.

"Anyways, I left and went to California, somewhere a vampire would never be, and tried to start a life there. At first everything was going well. I got a job at a cafe and met a nice guy." Jake smiled. "What's his name?", "What's it matter?", he shrugged. "I met _Caston _and we dated for a year. He purposed I fled the scene. Telling him that I needed some time to think. I called him and told him I couldn't marry him and we've dated ever since. Um...I got into some stuff and now I'm here.", "I feel like you skipped a few years Bells...and what stuff?"

"Stuff like drugs." he stopped me there. "Bella?! My Bella?! Doing drugs? Didn't this Casanova do something about it?! What the hell!", "It's Caston and yes he did do something about it. He sent me here to recollect myself." he didn't speak for a minute. Had I told him too much?

"Oh, well I'm gonna have to meet this guy. See if he's good enough for you.", "Your not my father.", "Well I care about you. And I don't want this guy to hurt you.", "Jacob stop. I've been with him for like 3 and half years now. I think I know if he's good enough or not." Jacob smiled and Bailey called his name again.

"I gotta go. I'll talk to you about your drug addiction later." he gave me a not so warm hug and left. My drug addiction. Is that what you can call it really? I wasn't addicted to drugs, they just filled the hole that stung at it's tips, for a while. Is that an addiction?

Jacob's room looked the same as it always has. The bed sat in the same small corner of the dreary room. His blinds still closed letting in no light. His closet looked like it threw up on the floor, which I guess is the last things a werewolf needs to be worrying about, and his blankets were strewn across the room. I could only imagine how they got there.

Without thinking I got up and did what I've done so many times before. I cleaned Jacob Black's disgusting room. About half an hour later someone opened the door. I turned around to see a girl, about my height, with tanned skin, and big brown eyes framed by brown and black long hair. She was beautiful in her own way. This must be- "I'm Bailey. You must be Isabella."

"Bella." Oh that came out a little venomous. "Oh, yes. Well I need to talk to you if you don't mind." Of course I mind. "No, not at all." she smiled and came closer to me. "I know about your and Jacob's past. He told me...well he didn't really have to tell me. I could see it really. And I know that you guys are best friends but that's going to have to end." Hmm? "Go on." I told her because I'm going to let her speak before I make her unable to move her mouth.

"Well, Jacob and I are getting married soon and I don't think he needs the pressure of well....you, on him. He's finally moving on and I would rather you stayed away.", "You know he invited me to stay right?" I asked her and I let the venom seep.

"Oh! That too, well you need to leave. You aren't welcomed here Bella. I'm sorry." she said apologetically and I only smiled. "I'll leave when Jacob tells me I'm no longer welcomed Bailey. And I don't even think I'll leave then because I'm getting the feeling that your somewhat threatened by me." Oh gosh. I didn't just say that...that wasn't me. That...was...nope. Not me.

"Threatened? By you?" she laughed. "Jacob loves me Bella.", "Awsome Bailey, can't wait to see how long that lasts.", "You just don't understand! You and all of the other sluts trying to-" My fist sprung forward and hit her in the jaw. It felt good but wrong all at the same time. I knew I would be getting crap from Jacob but this girl just called me a slut! She had it coming.

Bailey held her face where I had hit her. "Anything else Bailey?" I asked and I tried not to let her konw that my fist throbbed with pain. And then Seth stepped in the room. "Oh dear. Jacob!" Seconds later Jacob was in the doorway. Bailey ran to him of course and I only smiled.

"What happened?" he asked anyone who would answer and of course Bailey did. "She- she hit me!", "Way to be Bella!" I heard Seth hollar and I shook my fist. "That girl of yours has a hard head Jake." he didn't smile. "Bailey go with Seth." Jacob just about growled and then they left. Jacob came to me.

"Why would you hit her? You can't come here, try to ruin my life, and then punch my fiancee. You have no right Bella!" he screamed at me and I screamed back. "No right? I don't think I have to explain to you why I punched Bailey in the face Jacob. Because obviously I wouldn't have done it if it wasn't deserved! And ruined your life?! Whatever. Your something else Jacob you really are." I grabbed both of my bags and started carrying them out to the car. I got them into the trunk with much struggle, and turned around.

Jacob was standing six feet about from me. Bailey behind him smiling. "Would you like me to punch the smile off your face Bailey?" she glared at me and I saw Seth laughing inside. "Leave Bella. And don't come back please. I dont need you killing my fiancee." I got into my car and blared the music before leaving.

_**A/N: So this is my new story I'm working on! Tell me if I should continue please! I appreciate your opinions, they absolutely make my day! Thanks for taking your time to read this! ( :**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**So....I'm so excited that you all like this story! Except for some harsh comments, I appreciated your opinions and ideas. Keep it up! And I figured that I'll start this early. **_

_**NEXT CHAPTER = 4 REVIEWS**_

_***~***_

When you're little you have dreams....and hopes. I don't remember what mine were, but I know they didn't involve all of this banal drama that I've been submerged in. Like Edward leaving me wasn't enough, now I have to deal with probably never having Jacob as a best friend. The thought opened the hole in my chest that I thought that Caston had closed. Obviously not.

I picked up the motel phone and dialed Caston's home phone number. "Hey baby.", "Hey.", "Didn't I tell you not to call me?" he asked jokingly. "Yeah, but I miss you.", "I miss you too sweetie. That's why I'm going to come down there with you. I figure I'll have to meet your dad someday.", "Don't you think we're moving a bit fast?" I'm really not to sure about even staying with Caston. Three years hasn't really showed me anything.

"Bella. Honey if you don't want to move any farther in this relationship please tell me now.", "I...I don't know.", "Sure you do. Just tell me because I love you but if you don't want to do this anymore...", "I don't know what I want Cas.", "Call me when you figure it out." There was a moment of silence. "I love you Bella.", "I know Cas." and I hung up.

So I've lost everything now. My boyfriend, my best friend, my dad doesn't even know I'm in Forks! and I lost myself long ago. I reached into my bag and tried to fill that hole in my chest once more.

~!#$%^&*()_+{}:"?

I answered the phone with shaky hands. "Hi.", "Bella?", "Jake? How'd you f-find me?" my vision was getting more blurred until I couldn't feel the phone in my hands. "Bella. Bella! Answer me Bella!", "I-I gotta go Jake."I threw the phone on the floor and sunk into a pool of darkness.

~!#$%^&*()_+{}:"?

I filled my lungs with much needed air and opened my eyes. The room still smelt like pot but that didn't really bother me. I vaguely remember Jacob's call last night. I just remember picking up the phone and hearing his voice. It was somewhat soothing in a way. I remember that.

I sat up. "Ow." I groaned. My head throbbed. I picked up the phone and called him. "Bella! Where are you?! I've been looking all night!", "Seriously? Jacob I'm at a motel. What'd you want?" I whispered because in all seriousness my own voice makes my head ache.

"I want to talk to you about yesterday.", "Can you stop yelling at me please?", "I'm not?Bells what'd u do last night?", "Came to a motel and tried to forget that you exist." I knew that was harsh but he asked. "Do you did drugs last night?", "I'm not talking to you about this Jacob.", "Come over. Bring your things.", "Why?", "Just do it please. Bailey isn't here." Oh great so now we're sneaking around Bailey.

I heard the dial tone and took a shower to rid myself of the smell of pot and got some new clothes on. I put my stash in my bag...hidden of course, and checked out. While driving to Jacob's I felt like the old Bella for a few minutes. Driving to Jacob's house without anyone knowing. Going to see my best friend with all of my things packed. I smiled at the feeling. That feeling was drowned when I pulled up and saw Jacob standing outside of his house with his arms crossed. He looked dangerous.

He walked to the car and opened the backseat to reveal my bags. I got out and pushed him away. It was easier than I thought it would be. "What do you think your doing?!", "Helping you, now move before I move you." I would move so he picked me up and moved me. He was in my bags and he pulled out my "healing mechanism". His face showed disgust and dissapointment.

"Jacob, put it down." I tried to sound feirce. How dare he go through my things. "No! This is ridiculous. I'm getting rid of it." he held it up for my inspection and I reached for it. "Jacob Black put it down! It's not yours and you have no right in the world to take my things away from me!" I used his line from yesterday.

"Yes I do! Out of my way." he tried to push past me but I stopped him. "Stop it Jacob!" I screamed and he turned around. Tears of anger were pushing past my lids. "You have Bailey, you have brothers, you have family. You. Have. A. Life. I have nothing! Unlike you Jacob for the last four years I've been miserable!" he stopped and looked at me more intently now. "I had to make a living off of....things that you can't even imagine me doing. And that, what your holding in your hands, is the only thing that at the end of the day makes me forget about the biggest mistake of my life that I made four years ago. Now hand it to me." I wiped my tears away.

"What was the biggest mistake of your life?" he whispered. "Not loving you the way you loved me. Please hand me my things so I can leave.", "Where will you go?", "Back to the life I had before I came back here Jacob! Back to Caston, back...to wherever I came from." I wasn't about to tell him where I came from exactly. Then he'd follow me there, no doubt.

"I can't hand you this stuff. I'd feel responsible for your death Bella. And I'm not going to have any part in it!", "Why do you care?!" I shouted to him, walking closer to where he stood. "You told me yesterday never to come back! And that I ruined your life. I can't stand anymore heartbreak Jacob." I reached for the bag but he ran into his house and locked the door.

"Damn it Jacob open the damn door!" I banged on the door like the fool that I am, and practically begged for him to open it. And then I heard the garbage disposal. "Damn it!" I screamed and collapsed onto the ground. I heard a car pull up I didn't move.

"Bella. I thought you weren't supposed to be here." Her voice was like nails on a chalk bored. With tears streaming down my face, and my knuckled beat red from banging on a door, I stood up and walked to her. "Do you _really_ want to go there with me right now Bailey?", "Where's Jacob?" she asked me, her glare still hard and cold. "He could be dead for all I care." I whispered and walked back to my car where slammed the back doors and then Jacob came out of the door.

"Bella, don't leave.", "Fuck you Jacob." And I jumped into the car and drove the opposite way to Forks. I'm going back to where I came from. Wherever that is.

_**JPOV  
**_

Bella smoking pot. It made me want to cry. But of course I'm not gonna. Bailey wrapped her arms around me and I hugged her back. "I love you so much Bailey.", "I love you too Jake." I could hold her in my arms forever. Maybe longer. But I knew I had to get Bella before she hurt herself.

"Your going to go and find her aren't you?" Bailey asked me in a whisper. "Yes. I have too. She's my best friend Bailey." I tried to get her to understand. I don't think she wanted to. "What about if it was Eggar?" she looked up at me and smiled. "He's a dog...it's different." I kissed her lips once and grabbed the keys to the rabbit from her hands.

"I'll be back by dusk." and I walked out the door. Shutting it behind me. I had no idea where Bella could possibly be but I knew I had to find her. I can't deny that a part of me still loves her. But right now, not as strong as the part that loves Bailey. She's my imprint. I can't change that. And I don't think I would if I could.

I had no idea where to look first so I just hoped to God that her cellphone number hasn't changed. I dialed the number while driving through Forks and to the highway. "Hey, it's Bella. Leave a message." , "Bells, you need to call me back. I need to talk to you." I threw the phone in the passenger's seat and forced the old car forward.

The sun was setting so I texted Bailey and told her I wouldn't be there. Damn it this car is so slow! It's times like this that I wish I was still a wolf. And not a 20 year old driving a homemade car. Sam said I'm not fully human yet....so maybe there's a chance that I could still have some wolf left in me.

I parked the car on the side of the road and ran into the woods. It wasn't hard to get angry, not at all. But I couldn't fully trigger it. I felt myself falling apart but the pain was unbearable. My body didn't want to give into the wolf. Don't deceive me now. If I don't do this Bella could die, I could never see her again, I'll never have my chance. And with a scream of intense pain I phased. I shook off the feeling of being torn apart and instantly heard the pack minds. _Jake! Man! How'd you phase?! I thought you were done! _Embry was the happiest one. The rest of them were just confused.

_I can't explain right now. Just look for Bella. She should be on this highway somewhere. You'll know when you see her. _I told them and even Sam agreed to go and look for her. I ran the sides of the highway until the sun was fully set. Someone needs to find her. I can't lose her. I just got her back

_Jacob. I found her. She's asleep on the side of the road in her car. _Collin told me the directions and when I arrived there he was fully clothed and waiting for me. I phased back as well and an uncommon sort of soreness filled my muscles. I stretched them out and told Collin to go. Once he was gone I opened the door quietly and put myself in the passengers seat.

_**BPOV**_

I opened my eyes and then tried to blink the hallucination in front of me away. Jacob can't actually be sitting here next to me. This is a dream. A faraway fantasy that I wish was happening. I looked down and saw that he was naked. This is definately a dream. He looked down at himself and blushed. If this is a dream I'm sure as hell gonna live it up.

I threw myself at him and his soft lips molded with my own. If this isn't heaven I'm not sure what is. I've always imagined what it would be like to kiss Jacob. Even when we were teenagers and I was dating Edward, I used to sit on the beach with Jacob and think about kissing his lips. When he speaked the feeling became even worse. But my thoughts did him no justice. His kiss was undescribable. Perfect. Better than Castons and Edward's. And thats saying something.

Jacob's hands were burning hot. Oh this is such a good dream. He put me on his lap and unbuttoned my jeans. I shimmied them off and threw my jacket in the backseat. He moaned into my mouth and ripped my shirt right down the middle. I was too caught up in the moment to yell at this dream Jacob so I didn't say a word as he did the same thing to my bra.

"Jacob." I whispered and instantly regretted it. He pulled away but I kept my lips on dream Jacob's jaw and neck. Please don't stop now. "Bells...we can't do this." I sighed. "Please Jacob. At least give me this.", "I can't..." he sounded so guilty and I felt bad for putting him through this but he shouldn't have started what he couldn't finish.

"This could be the last time I will ever see you again. Please." this made him angry. I could tell by the way he grabbed my neck and kissed me with all of his force. Jacob slid my flimsy panties down my legs and put me on his hard length. He filled me to the hilt and our foreheads touched as he hissed at the pleasure building contact.

"Bella I've wanted this for so long." he whispered to me and I lifted myself up and then down again. "Me too Jake. Please tell me this isn't a dream...", "It isn't Bells. Ah...your really here with me." Jacob soon began lifting me at his own pace and I buried my face in his neck as he touched a spot inside of me that made me want to stay with him for forever.

"Fuck Jake!" I couldn't take the pleasure and the realization that he was here with me all at the same time. "Yeah baby, are you coming?" he grunted and I was fricken lost. "Y-yes! Don't stop!", "Ah! Bella I love you so fucking much!" That stopped me.

I came down from my climax and he didn't speak. He kept his face in my chest and I rubbed his head, trying to calm him. "Jake...you know we need to talk about this." I kissed his head and layed mine on his. "I know Bells...I do love you. But Bailey.", "I understand. Here, I'm gonna get dressed and I'll be on my way." I lifted myself off of him and I felt him kiss my hip, he let the kiss linger a little too long, but I didn't mind. Why did I ever leave?


	3. Chapter 3

_**I'm so excited at how many people like this story! Please keep voicing your opinions and I promise you, they will be taken into consideration.**_

_**~*~**_

I got some clothes out of my bag and dressed in the backseat. Jacob put me on his lap to talk to him. I must admit that it was a most compromising place to be.

He raised his hand and pushed my hair behind my ear, in the most loving way. He didn't smile though. This Jacob looked rock solid. I could no longer read him like a book. "You said that you loved me." I whispered and he nodded. "I could probably cop out and just say I was 'caught up in the moment'. But we both know thats not the case." I had actually accpected him to say he was just caught up in the moment, but that he didn't made me wonder if there was still hope for us. _But he's imprinted._

"We.....we made love Jacob." I smiled at this realization and blushed too. He smirked and I almost thought he was going to kiss me. But he just put our foreheads together, I breathed in his woodsy scent and it made me think of that old Jacob.

"I know Bells. And I don't regret it, but you know this can't happen again." It sounded like he was just trying to tell himself that it can't happen again. Because I knew it from the very begining. "I know. I'm going to leave. You have to get back to her and-" he silenced me with his mouth on mine. "Don't rush me." he whispered into our kiss and I wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my fingers in his hair. Loving the feeling of his arms around me.

His smooth tounge coaxed my lips open and began to dance with my own. Making the butterflies awaken in my stomach and begin to flutter around. I could barely see his features in the dark car but I didn't need to. I knew he was here with me. I felt his strong hold around me, I could practically hear the familiar beating of his heart moving much faster than mine.

The kiss slowed into a slow dance and then stopped alltogether. But my hands didn't leave his hair. And his hands didn't leave my body. "I hope I can see you again Jacob." I knew that this was our goodbye. Our parting...our last words in a way. "Stay." he murmured and I didn't have to even reply to him. He knew that his idea was crazy.

"Do you want me to drive you home?" he chuckled. "I think she'd become suspicious if I walked into the house naked and coming out of your car so...I'll run." I noticed that he didn't say her name and it bothered him. "Your a wolf again?" he smiled a wide grin. The familiar wide grin that I loved so much.

"Yeah. I just thought about how I might not be able to find you...and it just happened." I wasn't going the point that he obviously did still love me, so I got out of the passenger's seat and opened the door to the drivers. I didn't get in yet. Jacob came over to me and hugged me. He kissed my cheek and then my lips once before he turned away. I stopped him.

"Just know that I don't regret coming here Jacob. And I'm sorry for what I put you through before I left. You know I didn't mean any harm." he smiled. "Don't act like we're saying goodbye Bells. We'll see eachother again." he laughed. "This sounds so...romance novel it's ridiculous." I laughed with him and our laughter faded into an awkward silence.

"I love you Jacob." he didn't say anything. "You don't have to say it back Jake, I understand." I blushed from the embarrassment. "I love you Bella." I took a deep breathe and looked up at him. He waved and ran into the woods. I stayed there, on the dark road, for a few minutes before I saw a familiar large russet wolf come towards me. I couldn't control the tears that leaked from my eyes.

How many times can I wish I wouldn't have left before it will come true? Jacob got this look in his eyes and just like the first time I saw his as a wolf in the feild with Laurent, I knew what he was saying. He was telling me not to be sad. Because honeslty...we both know this can't happen. I nodded and he bowed his head towards me. I kissed it and held onto his fur for a second. When I let go he immediately ran.

I got into my car, deluded with the idea that that was the last time Jacob and I would ever see eachother. That is until he showed up at my car window. He was panting, he jumped into the passenger seat and grabbed my hand. "Come back, stay with me until you find a house of your own. Just _please_ don't leave." , "Jacob you know thats not a good idea.", "I won't make a move on you I promise." this made me laugh. He laughed a nervous laugh as well.

"Okay. But your going to have to get some clothes.", "I know, here I'll meet you at the house. I'll be clothes and everything.", "Okay Jake." I smiled and he waved to me before getting out and phasing. I waited outside of that red house until I saw his rabbit coming up the road. When he got out of the car he came to mine. I got out and he already had my bags in his hands.

I couldn't wipe the smile off my face. When he walked in and I behind him I could hear Bailey sigh. That made me smile more. "Bells, you can stay in Billy's old room.", "Great." Bailey rolled her eyes and walked away. Jacob carried my stuff to the bedroom and turned to me. "I'll be right back okay? Just make yourself at home." I nodded and he left. He shut the door behind him. Billy's old room smelt like Jacob. It was a comforting smell.

I layed on the bed and fell asleep.

*~*

I woke up and walked outside of the bedroom and into the kitchen. The clock said that it was ten at night. "Bailey...baby!" Jacob moaned and I actually had to swallow the puke in my mouth. They're moaning was going to make me cry, laugh, and lose my sanity all at the same time. I grabbed the cordless and went outside to call Caston.

"Bella. Have you decided?", "Yes. I love you Cas. And if you want to get married. Then lets do it." I knew it was a mistake as soon as I said it but if Jacob gets a happy ending with Bailey then I at least deserve something right?

"Really Bella? I'm so happy! I love you so much. When're you coming home?", "Uhm...I was thinking sometime next week. I miss you but I want to get a chance to see what've happened to all of my friends.", "I understand. I miss you too." I can't say that I don't love Caston, because I do. But I also can't say that he is my soulmate. Because I know he isn't.

I heard the door behind me open. I don't want to see Jacob right now. Why would he even do that with me in the house? And right after we- "So...do you have my ring yet?" I asked teasingly and he laughed. "Of course I do! It's in the safe of course." And did I fail to mention that Cas is filthy rich? Thats not why I'm with him, but that doens't mean I dont enjoy it.

"Bells. I need to talk to you." I heard Jacob murmur and Cas heard. "Who's that Bella?", "Jacob, a family friend. I'll call you in the morning Cas. I love you.", "I love you too baby." And I hung up. I didn't look at Jacob but I felt him sit down beside me. I shivered as a cold breeze whisped by me.

He put his arm around but I shrugged him off. "Just...don't okay?", "I'm sorry." his voice broke. "I didn't want to...she was getting suspicious and I had to do something." Do me! Woah Bella...calm down. "You don't have to explain why you had sex with your fiancee Jacob.", "I'm sorry." he repeated. "I'm not going to lie Jake. It hurts...", "I don't want to hurt you.", "Your doing a great job at not hurting me." I smiled sarcastically.

"Yeah...I've noticed. Damn, I'm bad at this." he put his head in his hands. A sign of defeat. "Bad at what?", "Trying not to act like I don't love you." Oh my gosh. My heart went into full beat mode and I knew he could hear it because he smiled and I blushed.

"Oh. I can stay with Charlie or something to make it easier...for the both of us.", "No, I said you could stay here and I meant it." he didn't seem to sure of himself. "Jacob we can't do this. I'm just going to stay with Charlie." I went to stand up but he grabbed my hand. I sat back down and he looked into my eyes. His gaze was peircing.

"I know this is wrong...it's sick...but I need you here. I love you and if you leave, it'll be worse than the first time. Don't put me through that again. Please." he whispered and his grasp on my hand tightened. "Okay Jake. I won't leave, but you know this can't last forever. I'm gonna have to go back to Caston.", "Your marrying him?" he must've overheard my conversation. "Yeah. I guess I am." I smiled.

"You can't guess about those things Bells. Are you marrying him?" Jacob looked angry. "Yes. I'm marrying Caston." I said to him just as meanly as he had spoken to me. "Oh." he looked down as if he was dissapointed. Did he think I was going to marry him or something? I'd like to but he has Bailey.

"Will you take a walk with me?" he asked me and I couldn't say no. I stood up and he did as well. I reached for his hand as we began walking towards the beach. We talked aimlessly until I realiized that we had sitten under "our tree". This made me smile to myself and blush. I hope he can't see me in the dark. "Why'd you blush?" he asked chuckling. "No reason. So do you have any jobs in mind? College maybe?"

I looked out at the moon for a second and then at Jacob. They shone just alike. "Nah. Who needs a job when you have a killer life like I do?" he was being sarcastic. I think. "How're you going to make money? Don't you want a family?" his smile faded. "I don't know. And I don't want a family.", "Isn't that he entire reason for imprinting? To make a family, make stronger little wolfs.", "No wolf is stronger than I am! And none ever will be. " he laughed and I joined.

"Sure it is. But that doesn't mean I want it. Bailey does, not me. I'm good just being the same age forever. Phasing whenever I want too. Doing whatever the hell I feel like doing.", "It feels like I'm talking to the same Jacob I did 4 years ago. The one who hadn't found his soul mate." he just shrugged.

"Do you want a family?" he mumbled to me. Do I want a family? Do I have a choice? Isn't it kind of mandatory once your married? Have five kids, raise them all to be angels, nag them about grandchildren once they're married...."Not really. I know Caston will though. His devilish mother will make us adopt if I really don't want to have children." Jacob nodded and suddenly looked deep in thought. I didn't know what to say to him, so I didn't speak. The silence was comfortable and made me calm and at ease.

I moved closer to Jacob as pre-rain wind began blowing past me. He put his arms around me and I fell asleep in his chest.

~*~

I opened my eyes and saw I was in my clothes from last night. I then remembered falling asleep in Jake's embrace. I smiled at the thought and got up to put some clothes on. When I was decent I went into the kitchen where Jacob was standing with a cup of coffee in his hands. He handed it to me and smiled. "Thanks." I whispered and he smiled and nodded. I took a sip and moaned at its perfection. How does he know just what I like?

I looked back at him, he was just leaning against the counter staring at me. I blushed. "What?" I asked and he laughed. "Nothing." he murmured and it's then that I noticed that he was shirtless. He must've gotten more muscle. If it's possible. "Jake!" Bailey screamed and then she ran out to the kitchen with the most happy look on her face.

"I got the job Jacob! I got it!" she squeeled and hugged him. "Good job Bailey..." she looked at him and rolled her eyes. "The job at the newspaper?" she reminded him and he kissed her. "Baby! I'm so happy for you!" I just stood there, awkwardly drinking my extraordinary cup of coffee.

"But there's a problem." Bailey whispered. A problem? Any problem for Bailey is more than likely heaven sent for me. Jacob didn't speak so she went on. "I have to leave for California for a week. I have to leave tomorrow afternoon if I want the job. I won't leave if you don't want me to.", "No, no it's fine. This is your dream job. Go, get the job, and come back to me." he smiled and she kissed him.

I wasn't going to speak, in fear that my happieness would leak out of my voice. And that wouldn't be good. So I just kept sipping my coffee.


	4. Chapter 4

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Today Bailey leaves. I've waited all night long for this day and now thats it's finally arriving I'm more excited than ever. Maybe Jacob and I will be the same best friends at least while she's gone. Though I know he'll miss her....I'm still going to _try. _

"Bells, I'm gonna take Bailey to the airport okay?" I nodded happily as he peeked his head through the bedroom door to look at me, still covered up to my neck in plaid comforters. I heard Bailey whining about not being about to look over him, and not being able to find her shoes...which were expertly hidden and replaced with disgusting nikes. Who would do such a terrible thing?

The door slammed shut and then I got up to take a shower. I made sure I was smelling absolutely delightful and that I had cleaned every microscopic inch of my body. I'm not planning to do anything with him, I just want to look nice for him. Yeah, I'm gonna keep telling myself that.

After I brushed my teeth 16,000,000 times, I worked on my mess of hair. When I was finished I heard the door open. I smiled to myself. I walked out of the bathroom and his eyes widened when we saw me. I blushed.

"Bells...you look beautiful. What's the occasion?", "Can't I look nice for once? Jeez..." I heard him chuckle. "You look nice all the time Bella." he looked at me seriously. "Thanks Jake." When he began to step towards me I knew I should be taking steps backwards...but I didn't. And once he was in front of me I kissed him. He lifted me up and I heard a door open. And then I was being set on something soft. I looked to see that it wasn't his bed it was mine. Smart Jacob.

"I'm gonna make love to you Bells." he whispered in my ear and I shuddered. "Please Jake." I felt his scorching hot fingers lift my T-shirt over my head and I heard the whisp as it was thrown onto the floor. "What'd you need Bella?" it took me a moment to register what he was saying. And then another moment to remember how to speak. "You Jacob! I need you." _Click._ The button on his pants..."I'm yours."

~*~

"Bella." He mumbled in his sleep and I smiled. I pulled my naked body impossibly closer to his own and his arms flexed around me. Kind of like a reminder that I couldn't get away. And I was completely fine with that.

"Jake!" Someone shouted and I didn't want him to get up. This is our time! Why does everyone have to ruin it? "Jacob!", the voice shouted again and Jacob sighed. "Bells....what'd they want?" I kissed his chest. "You Jake, now get up." I smiled and he groaned. "I'm coming!" he shouted back to the facelss voice and he got up. It took all of my energy not to pull him back to me and say 'Screw it'. But I knew that whatever the pack was interupting us for, it's good. He threw on his pair of jeans and winked at me before he went outside.

I knew I had to get up as welll so I got some fresh clothes on and put my hair up before following where Jake had gone. I found him in the kitchen with Sam. He didn't look much different. "Bella Swan? What're you doing here?" he kind of looked scared. "She's visiting.", "Jacob you should've told me this. How do you know that the bloodsuckers aren't following her?", "I trust her Sam. If all your here to do is insult my family you can leave." His family? I blushed.

"I came here to tell you about the tribal meeting tonight. Concerning the stench we picked up last night along the border." The stench...must mean vampire. "If it's along the border they aren't coming over here so if you find anything that endangers La Push, call me. No tribal meeting." Jacob's voice was demanding. "You know this isn't a good idea.", "My word is final Sam."

Sam just left and slammed the door when he did. "Wow Jacob. Way to be enforcive." I joked and he just sighed. "Bella you know that those vamps that they smelt might be the Cullens right?" their name made the hole in my chest open a tiny bit but then the thought of Jacob closed it instantly.

"Yeah, I know. But there's nothing I can do about that Jacob. So...I'm not going to be worried, or sad about it. I'm gonna live it. Will you live it with me Jake?" I smiled and he leaned down to kiss my lips. "Of course I will." For that moment it was kind of like Bailey didn't exist. But I know she's coming back. And I can do nothing about that but live it.

_**EPOV**_

"I can't see her Edward. I'm sorry..." I couldn't be angry at Alice. If Bella...died, I can only blame myself. We've moved back to Forks. Last night I went to Bella's house. Her scent wasn't there. It was covered by dust, and lonely boxes. I suppose that Charlie died some years ago. His scent wasn't there either.

There was a new terrible wet dog smell in Forks though. That meant werewolves. I'm glad Bella isn't here to be endangered by them.

"Are you all ready? We've got to meet with the werewolves in an hour...to discuss the treaty."

_**BPOV**_

Jacob found out that he had to leave to meet with the new vampires about the treaty. "Bells you cannot come with me!", "I'm coming Jacob, whether you like it or not." I smiled and he groaned. "No. You are staying here." he looked into my eyes. "No, I'm coming with you. If you don't take me I'll just follow you." he sighed. I knew I had won.

"Fine. But I'm leaving right now.", "Awsome, lets go." I laughed and grabbed his hand. "You'll have to ride on my back.", "Fine with me." he rolled his eyes and went off to phase. I waited outside and when he came back I got onto his back and hung onto his silky fur. He's so soft. I zoned off for the ride.

When he stopped moving I got off of him and he phased back. He hurried to put his clothes on. "Really Jake? Like I haven't seen it all before." he seemed agitated with me. When he was decent we walked to a clearing with other half naked teenagers standing very feircly all in one clump. One whom I recognized as Quil came to Jacob and then looked at me.

"Where's Bailey?" he asked. "Not important right now." he growled and Jacob made a hold on my hand. "Holy shit." Sam cursed and then so did Jacob. "Bells, I'm so sorry." he whispered to me and I didn't understand until I saw his face. His pale features and his golden eyes stood out in the dark. His hair shone in the moonlight, and like so long ago I wished to touch it. I almost sank to the ground, but Jacob was holding me up.

This can't be real. The tears burned in my eyes. "Bella." he whispered and Jacob stepped in front of me. "Don't come near her leech.", "Let's be civil here." Carlisle stepped in front of the Cullens and inbetween the two tense species.

"I have to go...I'll walk I just...I can't do this." I couldn't breathe. I knew that I was probably overreacting but this was all too much. I closed my eyes and was submerged in blackess.

~*~

"She's waking." Alice spoke. I opened my eyes and saw that I was in an extremley familiar room. The walls were white, the furniture was white, the faces around me were white as well. "Bella!" Alice squeeled and hugged me. She pulled me into a standing position so I could see that only her and Edward were in the room. Only her and Edward.

Alice pulled away and smiled at me. "Carlisle said to bring you here while they worked some stuff out. We thought you were dead!", "No. I'm not dead." Close enough in the last four years. But not dead. How was I to believe that Edward and Alice Cullen were actually standing here with me in their home. The same home that I was last with them in. The home that my life was ruined in. This isn't real.

Edward just stood like a statue next to Alice's bedroom door frame. I knew this was Alice's room because of the many models of clothing and what not surrounding the walls. I looked past Alice and into his eyes with new found strength. "Your just going to stand there are you?" I asked him and I honeslty couldn't believe what I just said.

The look of surprise on his face couldn't be hidden. "I didn't think you'd want to speak with me." his voice was so soft. Like velvet. I washed away my thoughts of good things about this demon and spoke. "So? You came with Alice for some reason. And I doubt it was just to see if I lived.", "I love you, and I'm sorry Bella.", "I'm getting married Edward. Aren't you happy for me?" I replied sarcastically but I regretted it when I saw his heart break right in front of my eyes.

"I guess I should be. But I'm not. Let me explain to you why I left-", "No Edward. There's no reason why I should let you. Because we both know what's going to happen after you do. I'll probably end up forgiving you and break Caston's heart in the process. Jacob will be pissed beyond regocnition and probably kill us all. But if I just leave right now. And walk away....then everything goes back to the way it was before you returned.", "Who's Caston?" he asked me and stepped closer to where I was standing.

"Is that all you heard?" He's unbelievable! "Alice! You never told me about a Caston." Edward was angry of course. "You had Alice spying on me?!", "I needed to know you were safe!", "Why would you care?" he sighed. "Because I love you! I left for your protection."

"What do you think you'd be protecting me from by hurting me?", "My existance. Everything around me." I guess in a twisted way that makes sense. It's the same reason that I left Jacob here in La Push without telling anyone I was leaving. I did it to stop leading him on. To let him live his own life. And then I came back, just as Edward has, to start over...to pick up where I left off. But it can't be that way. Because I've moved on.

"Tell me if I'm too late Bella." Alice must've secretly left the room during my thoughts, because she was nowhere to be seen. "I'm not sure Edward. I have a fiancee...I'm in love with Jacob...and I've always loved you....so I'm not sure what I'm doing." And then he was in front of me. His face not inches away from my own. His breathe was sweat on my lips. My body craved his.

"I can't do this." I whispered. "Yes, you can Bella. You want to. You know it as well as I do.", "Which means nothing Edward. I'm an adult. And I have to make adult descions so...I'm going to leave now." he stopped me. "Bella, I'm over 100 years old. I know a lot about adult descions. I can promise you that staying with me is the right one." I shook my head and looked into his eyes.

"For you maybe. But not for me. Goodbye. I hope that I can see you again...maybe we can even be friends but until I figure things out we can't progress. I'm sorry." the word 'friends' matched with 'Edward' didn't seem to work but I suppose that I can't turn back now. I walked down the white staircase and out the Cullen's door. I reached into my pocket and got my cellphone.

"Jake? Can you come get me? I'm at the Cullens." I was actually happy that the drama was half over. "Yeah, be there in five minutes." he hung up and I sat down on the steps. Alice sat down beside me. "Ya know...he hasn't smiled in years right? Not until tonight. We all miss you.", "I know Alice, but it's time for me to move on. I need you leave you all in my past. I'm begining to realize that Edward leaving was the highlight of my life." What a laod of crap. Edward leaving was the worst part of my life. There was never another time that I've felt so close to dead.

"You don't believe that.", "I do Alice.", "No you don't , because you aren't going to marry Caston Bella. You're going to marry Edward.", "How would you even know-" I stopped and looked at her. She smiled. "I can see the future Bella.", "But I thought it was based on people choices? I didn't choose Edward just now. I completely walked away from him.", "Yes, consiously....but subconsiously you've done the opposite." and then the rabbit pulled up.

I didn't say goodbye to her before I jumped into the rabbit. "Bells I'm sorry. If I knew they were coming I would'nt have let you come.", "But I would've came anyways. Jake it's not your fault. And it's not a big deal. I'm going home tomorrow anyways." he stopped the car and forced me to look at him. "No." was all that he said.

"I have to. Cas is waiting for me. I don't want Edward, I don't get you...what more do I have to stay here for?" he smiled. "I see your point. We better get to my house quick then." What?

Jacob pushed on the gas as hard as he could and the car jolted forward. I didn't ask questions as he stopped the car and pulled me out. "What're you doing?" he was forcefully pulling me into the small red house. There were no lights on inside and that only made me suspicious.


	5. Chapter 5

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When we got inside Jacob switched on the lights. There was nothing? And then I saw it. A puppy? "What the hell Jacob." I was so confused. What am I going to do with a fricken puppy? "It's a puppy!" he looked happier than I was. From what I know puppies are messy. I don't like messy.

"You don't look to happy." way to state the obvious. "I'm not. Why do I want a puppy?", "To remind you of me!" his smile wouldn't go away. I have a puppy to remember Jacob? Oh! Because he's a wolf. "You can keep the puppy Jake. I won't forget you." And I really don't want a puppy!

He chuckled and then took my hands in his, looking at me seriously. "I'm sorry that things didn't work out. I promised you I'd never hurt you and here I am...hurting you.", "It's fine. At least in the end we're still friends." I smiled. "Yeah. At least we're still friends." he laughed and so did I.

"I talked to Bailey...she doesn't mind if you come to the wedding. Well she minds, but I told her how important you are to me and she understood.", "Sure she did.", "So am I invited to yours?", "Yes Jacob. Of course.", "Okay, so since you've decided that you're leaving tomorrow, _I _decided that I'm going to make you the best dinner you've ever had." he swiftly moved away from me.

"What do we have here..." he opened the cupboards. "Yeah, not much." he made a dissapointed face. "How about I use the little resources that you have and make a killer dinner? You can help.", "Sounds good to me." his grin resurfaced and I went to inspect what little food Jacob had.

"We usually all go to Emily's for dinners." he explained and I understood. He probably wants to stay close to the pack even after he isn't a werewolf anymore. Jacob left and I picked some random ingrediants out of the cupboard. When I turned around Jacob was singing Pasty Cline and made me sing and dance with him. It was like old times for a moment. The two of doing whatever we wanted to. Forgetting about what was going on...until my phone rang.

Jacob carried me to it and set me down laughing. "Hello?", "Bella, sweetie I've come up with a plan. Since we're getting married we should meet eachother's family right? Well I'm coming. I'm on my way now." I froze. Caston is coming here?

"Uhm...it's kinda late isn't it?", "Yes but I figured you'd be up and I miss you. Your father lives in Forks right?" I laughed. "Yeah.", "I'm gonna stay in a hotel. Would you like to stay with me?" he knew the answer. "Yes. But I'm with a friend right now so can you just by here and pick me up?", "Sure where are you?" I gave him the directions to Jacob's house and he said he's be here in an hour. We hung up and I turned to Jacob and the burning food.

I ran to the stove and turned it off. "Who was that?" his face was hard. "Cas. He's gonna come by here and pick me up if that's okay. I guess I'm going to be staying in Forks for longer than I thought. He wants to meet my family.", "Do I get to see the guy?" he wasn't looking at me. I stopped trying to fix our dinner and made him look at me. "You're my family aren't you?" I smiled but he didn't. "Just behave yourself okay?", "Sure, sure." he cracked a secret smile when I turned.

Jacob and I settled for ordering pizza and when we were finished Cas's car pulled up. Excitement boiled in my chest. I haven't seen him for what seems like years. I miss him. I ran out to his BMW and he caught me in a hug. "Ugh Bella. I missed you baby.", "I missed you more Cas." He pulled away to kiss me and I couldn't help but to compare Caston kiss to Jacob's. I tried to keep my mind away from the results.

I took him into the house to get my things. Jacob was nowhere to be seen. I looked at Caston in the light. He looked the same. He had the same stunning short blonde hair, same blue eyes, same snobby rich appearance. But he wasn't snobby. He was lovely. I went to Billy's old room and gathered my things. He came in to help me.

"So where's your friend?" he asked me and I looked at him. He was unbuttoning the two buttons on his shirt and I laughed and so did he. I buttoned them back up for him. "He's probably in his room which means none of that." once we had my thing packed Caston carried them out to the car. I stayed inside. I knocked on Jake's door. He probably feels like I did when I meant Bailey. Like nothing. Numb almost.

He answered it with a weird look on his face. "Aren't you going to say goodbye to me?" I asked. "Sure." Cas was in the living room and when Jacob and I stepped out there with him Caston looked at me like I was insane. "Cas, this is Jacob Black. An old family friend. My best friend really.", "Nice to meet you." Caston said and they shook hands. Jacob wasn't behaving like I had told him to.

"Um, okay. I don't know if I'll be here tomorrow Jacob. But I'll call soon okay?" he leaned down to whisper in my ear. "No drugs understood?" I nodded embarassed and he kissed my cheek. "Bye Bells." Caston and I walked outside hand in hand and I could feel Jacob's stare burning through me. I wanted to turn back and run to him. But then I remembered my fiancee.

We got into the car together and as he drove I saw the smile on his face. Ugh....why doesn't his smile affect me that way that Jacob's does? Why is this so damn hard?

"Bella I can't believe we're getting married." he looked at me and I grinned back at him. "I know it's...surreal." Probably not the most romantic word in my vocabulary..."You don't seem to excited baby.", "I'm just tired. That's all.", "I hope you're not too tired. I have something planned for tonight." he laughed to himself and this made me happy and guilty.

A week ago I was dead set on Caston. Now I'm not too sure. I love Cas. But not in the way he thinks. At least not anymore. We made small talk for the rest of the ride and then Cas pulled up to a fancy hotel that I didn't think Forks had. We probably aren't even in Forks anymore.

"Here we are." he got out and came to my door. When he opened it I felt like I did one week ago. In love with Caston. I tried to shove my thoughts of Jacob and Edward into a box. An unbreakable box, and put them away but they kept popping back.

Cas took us up to an elevator, saying that we could get my things later. We walked to the end of a long hallway with golden colored walls and dimmed lights. Then he opened a pure white door and my mouth must've dropped a few feet at least.

In the room was a huge white bed, draped with white curtains. Rose petals were strewn across the floor and a scent like...vanilla? filled my nostrils. "Do you like it? I-I know you don't like anything too fancy but I th-" I grabbed him but the hand and ran into the room. I threw him on the bed and he laughed.

"I love it Cas." I whispered before unbuttoning his shirt. "Eager?" he chuckled and captured both of my hands and put me underneath him. I could see his chiseled chest and my core throbbed with need. He let go of my hands and they immediately went to removing the rest of his shirt. I ran my hands all of his stomach and he groaned and kissed me.

A moment more perfect than this? I don't think there is one. At least not in my life. Not yet.

~*~

I climaxed three times before tripping my way to the shower where I relaxed myself under the hot water. I didn't stay in long. I was afraid that thoughts of...them...would come to my mind if I thought too much. So when I got out and wrapped myself in a fluffy white towel I ran to the bed and threw myself at Caston laughing. He laughed as well and wrapped his arms around me.

"I love you Isabella.", "I love you Caston." I pulled myself closer to him and he groaned. "Mmm, your irresistable my Bella." I blushed. "Well I don't mind going at it again." I joked and I watched as he pulled the white comforter around us. "Let's rest. We have a lifetime let us cherish this moment." A lifetime?

~*~

A lifetime. Those words were in my dream. Those were the only words in my dreams. _A lifetime. _

I felt his arms constrict around me and he yawned. I got up slowly and dressed. My phone had only two messages.

_**Jacob Black: Happy Birthday Bells.**_

_**Edward Cullen: Happy Birthday Bella.**_

I must've forgotten. Today's my birthday. Today I turn 23. I don't fear age the way I once did. I've realized that age is a part of life. A vital part in anyone's life. Without it you aren't living. So I've learned to accept it.

"Happy birthday baby." two arms hugged me from behind and I leaned into them. "Thanks Cas.", "Don't think I didn't get you anything." Though alot has changed in the last five years, my disliking of surprises stays the same. "This is more than enough Caston. Please don't.", "Don't you want your ring?" Oh!

Without another word he moved in front of me and got into one of the dresser drawers. He pulled out a black velvet box. "Isabella Marie Swan. I've loved you for three years. And they have been the best three years of my life. Will you marry me?", "Duh!" I exclaimed. Did he think I was going to turn him down?

He smiled and opened the box. It was perfect. The ring was small with one diamond and a million others surrounding it. It was simple yet elegant. "Do you like it? I had Aya help me pick it out. I can take it back an-" I put my finger on his lips. "Shh, I love it." Aya is Caston's older sister with great style. She reminds me of myself most times.

"I knew you would." I laughed at this and he picked me up, throwing me onto the bed. "Mmm, is this the other part of my present?" Because this I wouldn't mind. Linkin Park blared from my phone and I sighed. Cas handed it to me.

"Hello?", "Bells! It's good to hear your voice." Caston could hear everything he was saying and that made me nervous. Would telling Jacob not to talk about our...sexual acts make Cas suspicious? "Do you and Casanova wanna come to Charlie's for a birthday dinner? Everyone's gonna be there." I looked at Caston. He nodded and smiled. I know how badly he wants to meet my family.

"What time?", "Everyone's gonna be there at noon and dinner is at four." I looked at the clock on the hotel nightstand. It was nine. "Kay, we'll be there.", "Love you bye Bells.", "Bye Jacob." I hung up and he had the biggest grin on his face. "We better get ready to go!", "It's nine o'clok.", "Yeah, but I'm trying to make up an excuse to get you to take a shower with me." I laughed.

"You don't even need to ask. " I sighed and smiled. I stripped my clothes while he started the shower. As soon as I got in Caston proved his love to me.

_**JPOV  
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Being away from Bailey is actually causing me physical pain. It's ridiculous. I miss her so much. I haven't talked to her once while she's been gone. It's going on day 4 now. I'm miserable. And when Bella decided to leave with Casanova I was left here to sulk. But now I have a good excuse to be around her. Her birthday. Does she still hate birthdays? She never told me.

It's eleven now. Charlie said he has all of the decorations up and the entire pack is already there. I'm just sitting at the kitchen table. Billy died after Bella left. I'm not sure if she knows or not. I'm certainley not going to be the one to tell her. She thinks that he's living with Charlie and Sue....she's wrong. He's living in a reserved spot next to my mother. I felt the tears stinging in my eyes so I coughed loudly and stood up.

I'm the alpha. I'm not gonna cry. Nope. And once again I defied myself.


	6. Chapter 6

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We pulled up to Charlie's where other cars were parked as well. It pained me that not only was Jacob's family here....but the Cullens as well. This is ridiculous. They're going to start fighting and I don't want Charlie to see it.

Caston helped me out and kissed my cheek. He reached for my hand and we walked towards our death. Sue opened the door with open arms. She embraced me and then Cas. I saw the two completely different families scattered around the downstairs. Like a normal family? Alice smiled at me and winked. I smiled back.

Caston went to meet and greet with my father who didn't notice that I was here yet. "Bella." My heart stuttered. I turned around to see Edward behind me. Holding a silver box in his hands. He held it out to me. "This is for you. You don't have to open it now." I took it from him, it was freezing cold. "Thanks..."

"Bella!" my father shouted and I went to hug him. "Three years Isabella. Three years without calling or even trying to contact anyone here. You just can't leave us behind kid." I smiled. He was right. I need to stop running. "I will Dad. I'm done now.", "And what is that on your finger missy?" he took my left hand and inspected the ring. "When did this happen?" he asked. "Last night. He proposed...and well...here we are." That was kind of a lie. He proposed a few days ago. Last night he gave me the ring.

"Oh, well Renee sent you a present. I think they're airplane tickets if you ask me." he grumbled the last part and I smiled. "Have you met Caston?" I asked and held onto his hand. I could feel Cas's smile and I knew that he was glowing. "Oh, well....yeah. You're telling Renee." he laughed and I laughed as well.

I saw Jacob out of the corner of my eye talking to Quil. "Where's Billy?" I whispered and hoped for the answer that I wanted. "He- Bells he died. I tried to reach you but I didn't know where you were. Jacob said to not try." That's not to answer that I wanted. My vision was getting shaky. Jacob told Charlie not to try. "I'll be right back Cas." I whispered and grabbed Jacob on my way up the stairs. I went to my bedroom and slammed the door behind me. "Why didn't you tell me Billy died?" his didn't looked phased by my question. "Tell me Jacob! Why?!", "Because! You left us Bella! All of us. Why would you care?" his shouting caught me off guard.

"And you're going to leave again....I can't do this. Here's your gift. Enjoy." He threw a box on my bed and went to walk away. I grabbed him and kissed him. "I don't wanna leave." I whispered and his two hands traveled up my shirt. "Then don't. Nobody's making you." his lips moved down my neck and to the hem of my shirt. "You're getting married." he whispered. "I know. Make love to me." I moaned and he complied.

His hands roamed my body quickly and with shaking hands. He was nervous. So was I. I was afraid of being caught. I was afraid of hurting Cas. I was afriad of hurting Edward. I was afraid of hurting Jacob.

But that isn't stopping me. He was wearing Jeans and a long sleeve shirt so it took longer than usual to get him undressed. "Bells I want you so bad." he groaned and slid my jeans off. I heard them as they hit the wall, then the floor.

I unclapsed my bra and threw it aside. My panties were next. They hit the floor and then we were one. "Oh God Jake!" he chuckled and kissed my jaw. "We need to be quiet baby." he moved inside of me slowly at first and then gaining speed. "Ah, dear God Jacob! Please, please..."I have no idea what I was begging for but he gave it to me anyways.

Someone knocked loudly on the door. "Bella? Baby are you in there.", "One sec...Jake." I whispered his name and I felt him come when I did. I held my tounge and rode out my ecstasy in silence. Jacob kissed my cheek and then my lips. The door opened.

And then it closed. "Shit." I cursed and jumped up, hurrying to get on my clothes. It must've been Caston. It had to have been. I'm such an idiot! Why would I have sex with Jacob with my fiancee downstairs? I ran down the stairs and I heard the door slam. "Damn it!" I cursed again and the Cullens looked at me with ashamed looks on their faces. I don't need their ridicule right now.

I caught Caston by the hand as he was getting into his car. He tore his hand away from me. When I looked at him he had a dead kind of look on his face. It made me really regret what I had just done.

"Caston that was _nothing_. It meant nothing I swear!", "I'm guliable sure, but come on Bella, I'm not stupid." he reached towards my hand and went to take my ring off. I took a step back. "I'm marrying you Caston. I'm sorry that what happened, happened....It wasn't planned. I love you. But I love Jacob as well.", "Then go marry him because obviously he's the one you'd rather fuck on your birthday!" Caston shouted and I was surprised. He rarely swears at me. And when he does he's joking. Not this time.

"I love you. I'm marrying you Cas! You can say whatever you want but I'm still going to marry you. I'm still going to follow you around with this ring on my finger. And don't think that I won't." he didn't smile. He sighed and looked away. He didn't look back at me when he spoke. "I don't want you around him Isabella." I went to argue and then noticed that his intentions weren't mean to hurt me but to help _us_.

"Okay.", "He can stay today, for your birthday, but I don't want you alone with him anymore. Promise me, please.", "I promise. Thank you Caston." I reached up and kissed him on the lips. "You're not completely forgiven but...I still love you." he told me and that was enough for me to live on.

We walked inside of the house again, this time with our hands to our sides. Everyone stared of course....they knew what had happened. Jacob came downstairs and everyone went back to their mindless, nervous chatter. He came to me and I felt Caston tense by my side. "I'm gonna go." he whispered in my ear. I grabbed his arm. "You can stay. Please stay." This is our last time together.

"That's not such a good idea." Jacob said and glared at Caston when he said this. "I think it is. Please stay, just for my birthday.", "Fine, but only for you." he kissed my forehead and I closed my eyes.

The rest of the party went by fine. Cas got me a necklace and a house, Edward got me a diamond necklace, Alice got me clothes, Emmett and Rose got me some cds. Jake got me a bracelet with charms that he had carved himself. It's these gifts that I cherished most becuase they were from the people that I love.

I fell asleep on the floor in Caston's hold. The guys were playing some complicated card game and I fell asleep with my head on Cas's lap and one of his hands in mine.

_**JPOV**_

I watched Bella's sleeping form on Casanova. Boy that pisses me off. Leech, The big leech, The mediem sized leech, Quil, Embry, Collin, Brady, Jared, Casanova, and I were all playing a nice game of poker. How lovely. 'It's great bonding' Bella told me. Pshh, she'll full of it. Bella whispered my name in her sleep and I smiled. "I love you Cas..." she just about moaned and his smile was sickening.

"Don't leave....Edward." Oh great. Leech's name too.

_**BPOV**_

I woke up when Emmett yelled "Yes!". I was startled and I didn't have Caston's hand in mine. I reached for it and he gave it to me smiling. "You okay Bella?" he whispered and I whispered "Yeah." I saw every boy in this house except Charlie in this large circle in my living room. They were playing poker. I knew this by the money and other things placed in a huge pile in the middle of the circle. I sat up and he put his arm around my waist, pulling me into his side.

I saw Jacob's hands lightly shaking and Sam took another gulp of the can of alcohol in front of him. He knew this was going to be a long night. So did I.

I kissed Cas's cheek and he turned his head to make it a full blown make-out session. I pulled away blushing. It annoyed me that he was doing this for the benefit of Edward and Jacob. Mostly Jacob. Well now that I think about, he doesn't know about me and Edward. Edward smirked and I knew he was picking the minds of the people around him.

"Cheater." I mumbled and he looked up at me and grinned. His venom coated teeth glittering in the glow of the light above us. I looked down at my ring that also sparkled in the light. I smiled. I heard words like 'fold' numerous times. I haven't the slighest idea what any of them meant so I just waited for someone to yell "Yes!" and then take the pile.

"Isn't it intimidating?" Emmett asked and no one knew who the question was directed to. "Ya know, to have both of Bella's ex-boyfriends here? And her ex-families?", "Not really. She's marrying me so I'm not that worried." I sighed. "Knock it off Emmett.", "Just saying..." he mumbleld and that awkward conversation ended.

After another hour I ran my hand up Cas's leg until I got to the top of his thigh. He put his hand on mine and looked at me. "I wanna go to bed." I told him. I looked at his watch. It was midnight. "Want me to come with you?" he asked. I smiled and nodded. "Okay." he pecked my lips and told everyone he was out. I looked at the rest of them as Caston went upstairs.

"You guys, all of you, are gonna get it. Be outta here by the time Charlie gets up." they all laughed but I was 100 percent serious.

I went upstairs and into my bedroom. Caston was laying on my bed, his arms out waiting for me. This scene is so similar. All he needs to do now if jump out through my window. I layed down in his arms without changing and fell into a very confusing dream.

~*~

When I woke Cas was looking through my things? "What are you doing?" I asked sleepily. I yawned and rubbed my eyes. "Just doing some looking. You don't have very many books." I haven't bought a new book since Wuthering Heights...I guess that was some time ago.

"Yeah, I don't read much anymore.", "Want to go to the bookstore? I'm sure I could find one for you.", "You do enough for me." I told him and was shocked to find that diamond on my hand. I had forgotten about it.

"I was thinking a June wedding." he said and walked closer to me. He was in the same clothes as last night. I layed back on the bed and pulled the blankets around me. "Sounds good. That gives us some time." The bed shifted slightly as Cas sat down on the bottom, looking suspiciously at me.

"Time...for what?", "Caston, I know who I'm marrying. It's you by the helped me with my broken heart, my depression, my drug use. Even when I pushed you away. You kept on trying. For three years. I love you.", "That's good to hear." he sighed in relief and moved over to kiss me. I kissed him back for only a moment before he spoke.

"I think we should go back to California to plan the wedding." Hmm? "What do you mean? I-I thought we could have the wedding here.", "Bella...let's talk about this later. I was just thinking out loud, I'm sorry.", "No, no! Let's talk now.", "Bella, not now." he told me sternly and I stood up.

"I have to go back today. I have to get back to work. Do you know how long you're going to stay here?" Uhm...the rest of my life maybe? "I'm not sure.", I sighed and he put his arms around me. "Cas, stop." I unwrapped him from around me and stepped away.

"I'm sorry Bella. You know I love you right.", "Sure, sure." Damn it! I need to stop doing that. "I'm gonna get ready to leave. What're your plans for today?", "Uhm...I don't know. Shopping I suppose.", "Hmm..." he mused and I looked in my suitcase for a shirt and jeans. When I found some decent ones I redressed myself.

When I turned around Cas was already gone. I picked up my cell and called Jacob.

"Bella?", "Hey Jake.", "I thought you weren't supposed to be talking to me.", "Oh stop it. When have I ever listened to someone who said I couldn't see you?" I laughed and he didn't. "Bells you should listen to him.", "What do you mean?" he sighed.

"Bailey's back...she's pregnant and...and she needs me now. We had fun Bells but it's time for us both to move on okay?", "It's not okay Jacob! I-I love you!", "Please Bella this already hard for me....", "What about me?! Please...just be with me one last time. And then I'll leave. You'll never see me again." he didn't speak for what felt like hours. "I'll be at Charlie's in an hour.", "Thanks Jake.", "Sure, sure." and then he hung up.

This is so selfish of me. To take Jacob when he doesn't even want me...but I need him one more time. I need to memorize every part of him. Emotionally and physically to keep in my memory until I see him again. If I see him again.

I pushed those thoughts from my mind and got a shower. I dressed in some simple clothing and waited in the kichen for Jacob to arrive. When it hit one minute past an hour I began freaking out. Would he stand me up like this? Does he have no feelings for me at all? I thought he cared at least enough to call....

And then he was knocking on the door. My heart went wild. I turned the knob and the door opened. Revealing Jacob...perfect Jacob. "Sorry I'm late...Sam needed me." his voice..."It's okay. I thought you wouldn't come though...I was worried." he didn't speak. I took his hand and brought him inside, locking the door behind him.

My arms wrapped around him and I kissed his lips. He didn't kiss me back. "Jake....if you really don't want to be here...I'd rather you left than did this to me.", "I do wanna be here Bells, I do. If this is going to be our last time together I want to take this slow. Okay?", "Okay...?", "Here, let's watch a movie. What do you have?", "Uhm...I'm not I'll look." I went to where Charlie kept the movies and sifted through them all.

Jacob picked out Lord Of The Rings which is a strange movie to set the mood but...uhm okay. I put the movie in and sat down on the couch. Jacob sat awkwardly next to me. I shifted away from him and he picked me up and set me on his lap. "I want to hold you." he whispered and I was fine with that.

Halfway through the movie I began drifting my hand downward to his pants. He then put my hand in his and I sighed loudly. "Not yet Bella...", "Why not Jacob? You are the first man I've ever met to turn down sex." he laughed and layed me down on the couch. And then he turned the movie off. Yes!

He slipped my shirt off of me and then my bra. "Jake.." I moaned when he moved his mouth to my breast. I felt his hand go into my sweats and past my panties. "Bells...you're so wet baby.", "Touch me Jake, please!" I whispered desperately and his two fingers teased me skillfully. "I am touching you Bella." his lips caressed my neck making it hard to think.

"Jake...please." those were the only two words that I could speak. They were the only two words that I could remember. "Just take them off Jacob." I finally spit out and then he was taking them off. I took his shirt from his God like body and threw it somewhere on the other side of the room. When I ubuttoned his pants his cell rang.

"Damn it." he muttered and got up leaving me naked on the couch. How lovely. I put my clothes back on completely pissed off and went into the kitchen where he was standing talking on the phone to someone. "Okay, yeah man I got it. Bye." he hung up and walked slowly over to me.

"I'm sorry Bells...I ruined it.", "Well you didn't _ruin _it." he smiled. "Good. Would you like to resume this upstairs?", "Yeah, let's go." I took his hand but he chuckled and picked me up. He ran up the stairs effortlessly and threw me on the bed. He climbed on me and tore my shirt right down the middle. "What the hell!" I laughed and he kissed my collarbone lightly. "I need you now Bella."' Jacob whispered and I moaned.

He slipped off my sweats and pulled my panties down my leg. "God Jake!" I groaned when I noticed he still had pants on. He laughed and took them off along with his black boxers. He hovered over me and looked straight into my eyes as he filled me completely. "Fuck Bells..." he moaned and kissed me softly as he thrust deep and slow. I wanted this to last just as much as he does.

He grunted as he thrust harder touching spots inside of me that I didn't know existed. "Jacob...Jacob I love you so much." I got out as fast as I could. "I love you Bella." and he kissed me again, this time harder and with more passion. We came together quickly and he layed down beside me, looking straight into my eyes once again. Jacob smiled a warm, wide grin and slowly took my hand in his own bringing it to his lips he kissed it. That kiss went straight to my heart.

"I love you." he whispered and I smiled.I swallowed hard and forced out what I wanted to say. "Jacob...I want to be with you so badly." my voice broke and I hid my face. I don't want him to see me like this. Escspecially when I know that I don't have a chance. When I know that he loves someone more than me....much more. Tears were spilling from my eyes freely.

I felt his hand on my face pulling my eyes to his. I looked at him and he looked like he was going to cry too. He pulled me to his chest and breathed in my hair like I was air. He was crying too. "I want you too Bella. I do, I do! I want to spend everyday of the rest of my life with you Isabella." I pulled away from him. "Then why don't you? Jacob I need you." I was sobbing still. I'm being so selfish right now. But I don't care. I need him. To live. To breathe.

"Bella I'm going to be a dad. I can't...I can't just leave." and I understood. He wasn't going to say how much he loved Bailey. He wouldn't do that to me. "I do love you Bella. More than anything or anyone in the world I love you. I always have.", "Please stop saying that....", "Why?" is he really asking me why?!

"Because I can't have you Jacob! I want to pretend that you're mine for today okay? I want to pretend like I chose you instead of running away four years ago. Okay?", "Okay Bella." we layed there for a few minutes before I heard someone knocking on the downstairs door. I looked out my bedroom window. "I have no idea who that is." I whispered so Jake looked.

"Oh shit. It's Bailey." Damn it! The knocking didn't stop. "Bella get dressed. Quick! And go tell her what she wants to hear. That I'm not here....you haven't ta-", "Jake I know." I laughed and dressed. I ran downstairs and answered the door. There stood Bailey. Looking like the bitch that she is.

"Jacob's in there, let me see him." she sneered and I laughed. "Seriously? Why the hell would he be here?" she smiled. "Because you have this weird obsession over him and think that he loves you. Now tell me where the hell he is!", "Okay Ms. Bitch listen. Jacob isn't here. And unless you want you're face bashed into my clean linoleum floors you'll leave.", "Really?" Bailey's hand moved towards me but then Jacob was there in front of me. He grabbed her hand and she looked at him like he was satan.

"You don't put a hand on Bella. Ever." he growled and of course she put on some tears. "J-Jake. I...why're you here?" she knew why. I smiled a toothy grin at her and she ground her teeth together waiting for a reply. "Bailey, baby it was a mistake I promise. We didn't do anything! I just-", she cut him off "I can't take this! Ever since that bitch came into our lives she done nothing but cause problems!", "Don't blame this on Bella.", "So now you're defending her?!" Bailey storned off to her car and Jacob followed.

"Bailey she's nothing to me! Nothing baby." I made Jacob looked into my eyes and I slapped him. Hard. I ignored the throbbing in my hand and tried to speak. "I'm nothing to you? After what we just talked about I mean nothing to you? I'm nothing? Don't come back here Jacob. It was a mistake for me to call you. Once you leave here, don't _ever_ try to contact me again." I paused. "I loved you." I whispered and shut the door in his face.

And then I went into my suitcase to get my stash. I smoked until I couldn't remember who I was.

*******

"She'll be fine Charlie. She just needs to rest." I opened my eyes and took in what and who was around me. Carlisle, Charlie and Edward. "How the hell did I get here?" I whispered and grabbed my head in pain. And then I flinched away from my hand in pain. My hand that I had slapped Jacob with was now in a bandage.

"I came home and you were passed out on the kitchen floor. I called Dr. Cullen here." I looked at Carlisle who smiled at me. I didn't return the smile. "Bella it seems like you were doing drugs...is that how you passed out?", "Yes." I answered simply. I sat up in what I recognized as Edward's bed and Charlie was then in my face.

"Isabella Marie I could have you put in a jail cell for this! Do you understand how serious this is?", "Yes." I answered again and he knew I wasn't listening. I snuck a glance at Edward. He was staring at me with shock and confusion written all over his face.

"Can I leave now?" I whispered. "No! I think you need to spend some time with the Cullens actually. Maybe some of their goodness will rub off on you." I've never seen Charlie be so parental before. My anger turned into fear at the thought of having to stand another hour in this place.

"Dad I'm an adult now. You can't _ground _me here.", "I understand that Bells." he stood up and left the room. I knew he was crying or moping or sulking or something else that parents do when they realize that they're children are growing up. I stood up but I felt a freezing hand on my arm.


End file.
